Crying into the Void over someone I don't even know...

[amypond45]

When Jared's tweets came in last night at about 9:30 my time all I could think was it's like 2:30 in the morning in Europe and Jared is crying out for help and it hit so hard I don't know how to express it. So I followed tweets for awhile until I was just too exhausted and teary-eyed to think, and then woke up again at 4:00 a.m. to check my twitter feed again and listen to Jensen sing "Sweet Home Alabama" and ask myself, okay, this is a person I've never met. I get why I cry about the characters, but why am I crying over this person I don't even know? Could someone please explain this to me? Cuz I'm a wreck. Yes, I sent tweets to him because ONLY THE MOST HARD-HEARTED MONSTER COULD RESIST THAT PLEA! Now I just need to vent because these emotions are stronger than they should be and my brain is telling me I'm a complete idiot but my heart is just sobbing.

Thanks for letting me vent, world!

Comments

[smalltrolven.livejournal.com]

I swear I could have written this post. Same here bb. I've never met them either, but they're both just so important to me, and I guess maybe I'm over-invested, no, I know I am. But the show, and following them as people too, gets me through the bad stuff, you know? So hearing that one of them is experiencing something maybe similar or close to what I struggle with really moves me. Feel a weird connection that I couldn't possibly explain. Seeing Jensen's near-tears while singing Sweet Home Alabama really got to me.
Sending you a virtual hug.

[amypond45.livejournal.com]

I think writing about them all the time makes them seem more real, and writing a J2 story right now where Jared is depressed is just frickin' weird. I'm feeling guilty, like I'm doing something wrong, which is bizarre in so many ways I can't get my head around it! I've struggled with depression too (who hasn't?!) so it's near and dear to my heart to write a character who's suffering with it, and of course it's just coincidence that this happened to Jared, but I still feel MISERABLE, like it's somehow my fault or something. I know, that's just the crazy talking, but it's hard to shake!