amypond45: (Default)
amypond45 ([personal profile] amypond45) wrote2015-01-03 08:59 pm

Done and Done

Finished! Story complete at 55K words (WHAT THE HELL!) so now it's time to edit and proof and LET GO. Wahhh! I swear it's like giving up a kid or something! I just don't want to leave these babies! But I have to believe they'll be fine, all will be well, etc. because it's all I can do. I have to be a responsible adult and move on to the next project. I HAVE TO!

This story has such a deep, emotional effect on me, I can't possibly explain it. I read FANGASM and Fandom at the Crossroads and it doesn't quite explore how deeply the individual person is effected by this story -- for me, it's as much a PERSONAL journey as a desire for community that hooks me so deeply. I've spent a year on my own, mostly, with this fandom -- writing, writing, writing -- because I feel I HAVE TO EXPRESS what the Winchesters' story makes me feel, whether anyone reads what I write or not.

But of course I'm human, and so I'm a social animal, and the need to connect -- to make my story matter and count for something -- brings me to communities like this one and the wonderful people I'm meeting through LJ and tumblr (how sad is it that I have NO ONE in my personal life who understands how important this story is?) and so in the end Lyn and Katherine are right, of course.

So here I am, finishing my first SPN challenge, joining this amazing fandom despite my innate shyness and introverted nature. So grateful, so humbled, so ridiculously excited!

[identity profile] elwarre.livejournal.com 2015-01-04 12:18 pm (UTC)(link)
This is such a very cruel post, because I want to read it now. :) When does it post?
Edited 2015-01-04 12:18 (UTC)

[identity profile] amypond45.livejournal.com 2015-01-05 12:49 am (UTC)(link)
Hahahaha! ::evil laughter::: Cruelty is my specialty \o/

My first challenge is this one: http://spnkinkbb.tumblr.com (oh god I don't know what I'm doing -- I hope that link works!) It's supposed to start posting on February 15, I think. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm sure having fun doing it!!!